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Unfaithfulness

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I can support you in my practice or online. In all cases personally and individually.

Monday to Friday, from 09:00 to 19:00

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Making a New Start

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Infidelity in a partnership is a great shock for the one who was betrayed, who does not know what to do with the anger and the great hurt caused by this breach of trust. It is worth taking a closer look at this event and exploring motives and not just throwing in the towel, because this situation offers many opportunities for a new beginning for the partnership.

Understanding why an external relationship could come about and what this has to do with one’s own role as a partner holds within it the possibility of personal development – as a partner and as an individual.

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My support

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Infidelity hurts in many ways. There is a feeling of having been betrayed because one partner was dishonest and lied. At the same time, the thought of not having given the other person what he or she needed is tormenting. In my couple therapy in Mainz I work together with you to find out the motives for the actions.

We often hide infidelity because we want to avoid hurting the partner or because it avoids reproaches and escalation. The reasons for entering into an outside relationship and their significance is important for the couple to help themselves. A one-off misstep should be evaluated differently to a long running betrayal.

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Our way

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To avoid a breakup, only absolute honesty helps. The partner who entered into the external relationship must acknowledge their actions. It is wrong to play it down or even to demand that the other person “not get upset about it”. Superficial accusations should be avoided. Sentences such as: “The way you’re getting upset, I should have kept quiet about it,” must not be used.
The deeper reasons for the external relationship must be addressed in order to save the relationship. If a partner is so unhappy in the relationship that he or she has found no other way out than to cheat, this should be spoken out. That is the chance to rebuild the relationship on a new basis. I support you in facing this experience.

Contact me

Contact me now by e-mail or phone and tell me about your concerns. If I am not available, I will get back to you immediately and we can schedule an appointment for an initial consultation. As self paying clients, you can decide on the frequency and timing of the sessions.

Initial consultation

In an initial consultation, both partners have time to describe their situation. Most couples take 6-10 sessions to arrive at new agreements Initially, we may meet every 2 weeks. Then the intervals can be longer. Many couples return to me for a couple of sessions year after year.

Each session lasts 60-90 minutes, during which we take time to create a new experience.

Couple therapy

Couple therapy is based mainly on systemic humanistic and family therapy theories. I always allow my strong intuition to adapt to your individual needs. 

An in-depth psychological approach is especially important with trauma-sensitive couples. 

I will help you to overcome fears and obstacles in your life.

I am

Susan Mir.

alternative practitioner for psychotherapy

My expertise is to help you cope with personal problems, psychological load, stress and burnout.

My wish is to harmonise your feelings with your thinking and the actions you take.

My work applies a solution focused approach.

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Your questions about infidelity

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There are various causes that are not always related to an unhappy relationship. For example, narcissistic infidelity serves the purpose of raising one’s own self-esteem. Fear of intimacy is also a common reason. Through the infidelity, a partner compensates for the fact that a relationship is getting to close to bear.

Infidelity either indicates that something is wrong in the relationship or that a partner has problems with loyalty in general. For about 85 percent of couples, the relationship deteriorates as a result of infidelity and almost 70 percent separate within the first year after the infidelity. But for 15 percent, the relationship is better after the experience.

Infidelity is generally the breaking of a promise or an implied agreement. In a relationship, both partners assume, even without a specific promise, that certain activities will only take place within the relationship. Emotional infidelity is when a partner directs their emotions toward someone other than their partner. Intellectual infidelity can also jeopardize a relationship if one partner only talks to third parties about certain topics. In recent years, digital infidelity is increasing, when a partner flirts violently in a chat.

What my clients have expressed

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